The cleanse

In all seriousness, I did actually start a cleanse. So essentially for 5 days I have chosen to skip food and supplement with pills/fiber. Yep, I'm cleaning out the old pipelines. The plan is to let this be a gateway to eat healthier and lose weight that I've been meaning to lose for a while. Overall, I refuse to go through another season where my clothes either don't fit or are begging to be unbuttoned at the end of the day. I think I'm finally done with a life confined in sweat pants after 6:00 pm. Here I am going on my second day of not eating and gulping down a sub par fiber drink with a bunch of pills. I don't think that would have been possible even a month ago for me personally. I have faith that I finally feel committed enough that I will succeed this time. My weight and I have been at odds with each other for quite some time. I first started weight watchers after college and it's been an up and down battle since. Right out of college, it was more an obsession than a matter of worrying about being healthy. I started an entry level job, was living with my parents and had not quite networked the area enough to have a riveting social life. I had all the time in the world to exercise, my mom made my meals for me, and I focused on it constantly. So, yes, I was pretty thin there for a while. So what happens next... my friends are all married, so no motivation to look good in a bridesmaid dress, work is not as low stress as it once was, so more focus on that and less on me, more focus on being married, more focus on being a mom. All of these things add up to me not wanting to cook after work so I can spend that with my husband and son and relax for a while before doing it again. I know inherantly that I have to change that. I have to be better for my family. Zachary deserves a healthy mom. So where am I now? Well, I'm going to start with this cleanse and work to be a person that I'm not disapppointed to see each day. I'm going to work to be healthier. I'm going to do what I do most days... try to be the best me I can be and hope that I can live that.